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Post by Caitlin Collins on Apr 22, 2009 19:30:49 GMT -5
Padding softly down the stairway in the soft shoes Caity had received in a package this morning, you could barely hear the Hufflepuff as she made her way downstairs. She was hardly a figure to draw attention anyway, with her diminutive figure and face perpetually sad and looking down at the floor. She might be recognised as the new girl who’d somehow gotten the Hufflepuff prefect role, or perhaps as the girl somehow related to that Gryffindor boy who’d killed himself. Some people passing her might know exactly what had happened to cause her to degenerate this much, but she couldn’t know that because she wasn’t looking at the faces that passed. She still wasn’t really interacting with people very much, despite D’rorah’s pep talk about how she had a place in this war. Because she still didn’t want a part in this war, and she wasn’t convinced she was welcome in it anyway... and definitely not by everyone. She was quite certain that one Elemental Master in particular would much rather have someone more equipped for this who didn’t argue with him.
So if you went by the expression on her face as she went down the stairs, you would never guess that Caitlin Collins had just turned seventeen. She was legally an adult now, in the wizarding world. But it sure didn’t feel any different. She could perform magic whenever she wanted... in theory. A scowl formed on her face and her hand clasped tightly around the wand in her pocket. She was still having no luck with the patronus spell. Nothing was happy enough anymore. Everything was soaked in death and sorrow, and kept getting pulled deeper in. So she was heading to the ballroom, where Dylan had helped her with it before. She doubted the boggart was still there, and really if it was that wasn’t going to help... she needed to be able to create a patronus without a threat first. And goodness knows what her worst fear was now... She was fairly sure it wouldn’t be a shadow any more.
Entering through the doorway, she brought out her wand and having closed the door, wasted no time in summoning the happy memory she had used before, when practicing with Dylan – the magic carpet ride over Hyderabad with her tutor and friends. [yellow]”Expecto Patronum!”[/yellow] she shouted, her voice the loudest it had been in a very long while.
And... nothing happened. Not even a wisp of white smoke. No glistening, glorious Indian elephant bursting from the end of her wand to gallop around the hall. Just... nothing.
She tried again, this time thinking of getting told she was a witch. She was trying to focus on memories that weren’t very clear, she realised, because they were in the past before all the hurt and pain had begun manifesting properly. Back when she had just been realising her potential and how much she could help people. But realising that brought her attention back to recent events and she dropped her wand before even trying, a grimace forming to replace her earlier scowl.
Taking a few steps to the side, she rested her forehead on the cool surface of the wall, trying to calm down and stop the frustration from overtaking her. Feeling a tear trickle down the side of her face anyway, one hand came back then slammed itself into the wall with her hand clenched into a fist, ricocheting off again as her face now creased in pain. She turned and slid down the wall with her bag to it, nursing her hand that had instinctually reacted in a method of getting out some of the pent up emotions she was always holding inside. They just wouldn’t go away, every day she woke up with everything clenched up tight like a spring inside... and sometimes it released, like just now. Dropping her wand so that it clattered slightly on the floor, the noise it made echoing around the room, Caity drew her legs up towards her chest and drew both arms around herself, focussing on the pain of her hand rather than the pain inside her at this whole damn mess.
She could feel a slight dampness on her knuckles that was probably coming from the graze she must have just placed on herself. She shouldn't be on her own today, other people should be here. Even though this time last year she hadn't known so many of the people she wished were here now, that didn't make their loss any less prominent now she'd let the thought into her mind. What a wonderful birthday she was having...
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Niobe Blakes
Ravenclaw
[blue]Fourth Year Ravenclaw[/blue] Shadow Warrior of Earth
Posts: 88
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Post by Niobe Blakes on Apr 27, 2009 2:45:16 GMT -5
"Miss? Are you quite all right?"
She didn't even know why she was here. The Ball Room wasn't exactly a place that she frequented or had ever had overly fond memories of being in. There was always the dance and other special events that happened here, but Niobe had never danced with anyone or had any special memories. Since there was no special event now, she should be anywhere else.
However, as she had been on her way back to her dorm room, she had spotted the girl walking toward this area. Naturally, Niobe was going to walk past, she tended not to get in other's business. However, there was something different about this girl. Something strange. Niobe could not quite pinpoint it, only that she felt a strong desire to follow. The sensation was quite disturbing, since the young Ravenclaw had grown up with strong beliefs about letting others invite you into their lives, not the other way around.
The feeling that she should turn back, however, never appeared, so she continued forward, keeping a polite distance.
She watched from the doorway as the girl chanted a spell several times with no effect. Curious now, Niobe continued to watch the girl. She looked extremely distressed. Alarm went through her when the girl abruptly smashed her fist against the wall. Niobe jerked, not sure what to do, but not wanting to move either. When the girl slumped down to the ground, not even bothering to tend to her hand, Niobe decided to do something...or rather, it was more of a compulsion. She had to do something.
Quietly, she pulled a kerchief from her bag, slowly walking over towards the girl. Taking a closer look, she seemed as if she were Hufflepuff house. Frowning in thought, she simply leaned forward, handing her the kerchief.
"You should get that hand looked at." she said after a moment of silence "Let me take you to the nurse."
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Post by Caitlin Collins on Apr 29, 2009 17:23:14 GMT -5
Focussed inwards as much as she was, Caitlin was paying no attention to anyone or anything around her. And so when she had entered the ballroom, she had not glanced about to see if anyone was following or had noticed her. She was so used to people not paying any attention to her that she wasn’t really expecting it. She didn’t hear the door open again after she entered the ballroom, nor did she feel herself being watched by Niobe as she had her breakdown. It was only when she was curled up in a ball on the floor following her slight collision with the wall that had gotten in the way of her hand – or something like that – that she heard the nearing footsteps. A quick peek from out of the shelter her arms made confirmed that someone had found her. This was just great... usually when she cried or it all got too much she at least managed to do so in a private place. But no, not on this occasion. She’d managed to get caught right in the act. She ducked her head away again, but this time moving it from side to side ever so slightly against the sleeves of the striped top she was wearing. She also made an attempt to pull the long sleeves over her injured hand, and would have probably succeeded if this newcomer hadn’t gotten to her too quickly. Before Cait could really process what was happening, she was being handed a cotton cloth of some sort and told that her hand should get looked to. Looking up at the other girl, whom she vaguely recognised as being a Ravenclaw in a younger year, Caitlin stayed still for a second before looking away to place the handkerchief as a makeshift bandage around her hand. It was particularly reminiscent of the time recently when Susan had done the same for her after her emotions had gotten too much... then it had also been taken out on one of her hands. She needed to get a better control of herself, even if everything did seem so overwhelming. She could feel that nasty, sticky dampness beneath her eyes that she knew once translated into appearance would make it obvious that she had been crying – in case it wasn’t already. [yellow]”Thank you...”[/yellow] she murmured quietly, not looking back at the girl just yet. [yellow]”And no, it’s okay... I can fix this myself, once I get my head back in place,”[/yellow] she replied, adding a joking tone onto the end. She wasn’t sure whether to give a reason or not... would it be more suspicious if she did give a false reason, especially given her tendency to have bad lying skills, or would it be worse if she just said nothing about it? For now, she stayed silent, waiting for a reaction from the other girl – she might just go away and forget about this, anyway. Miracles happen. At least, that was what she used to think... Caity hadn’t witnessed any miracles for a very long time, and was beginning to doubt their existence at all. [yellow]”I’m Caitlin,”[/yellow] she informed the other girl, trying to turn this into a normal conversation where two people had just met in ordinary circumstances.
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Niobe Blakes
Ravenclaw
[blue]Fourth Year Ravenclaw[/blue] Shadow Warrior of Earth
Posts: 88
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Post by Niobe Blakes on May 4, 2009 16:07:56 GMT -5
Niobe looked at the girl with a blank expression. She did not look okay, she looked terrible. However, it was not in Niobe's nature to pry, and so she would not. If the Hufflepuff girl said she was okay, Niobe would leave it at that.
"I'm Niobe Blakes." she introduced "It's nice to meet you Caitlin, although it's unfortunate it's not under different circumstances."
The girl would not look at her, which Niobe found unsettling. She was sure that it wasn't personal, but it was hard for Niobe to see someone in such obvious pain, and it wasn't just the pain in her hand. It seemed that almost everyone she met now-a-days was either depressed or upset about something. Niobe felt that she should do something, but what could one do? She was no super woman, she couldn't make all the hurt go away, whatever it was.
"Well, if you're sure you don't need a nurse, then fine." she smiled a bit "But try using an aloe plant and cocoa butter on those cuts." she offered "If you cut into the aloe plant, the 'juice' from inside helps heal cuts and burns. Cocoa butter helps scars fade, if you use it early enough," she pointed to Cait's hand "That probably won't even scar up. At the very least, it'll be extremely difficult to see."
There was a pause "Well, I should probably go. I didn't mean to intrude, and I'm sure you'd like to be alone."
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Post by Caitlin Collins on May 6, 2009 8:54:46 GMT -5
Caitlin avoided Niobe’s dubious gaze on her, and was very relieved that she didn’t question what had been said. She didn’t generally class herself as very good at bluffing – to strangers, to family, to friends. She just kind of mumbled and didn’t answer any questions properly. At least she had managed to speak coherently on this occasion, even if it still hadn’t been a straight answer. Perhaps it would be best to give some sort of semblance of a reason, even if it was vague. Schoolwork... that would work. It seemed to get a lot of people into stress... if she actually processed how badly she was doing recently, that would likely make her cringe anyway. She never had caught up with lessons after returning from her parents’ house... which she still didn’t really class as ‘home’ yet.
[yellow]”Yeah... sorry Niobe... I kinda lost my temper. I’m really behind on schoolwork recently and can’t seem to catch up.”[/yellow] It was all true, and if Niobe did happen to be in some of her classes she would see it was all too true. She forced herself to turn her head so that it was at least in the direction of Niobe, even if still not meeting her eyes.
[yellow]”I’ll be fine, I’ve done quite a few healing spells before...”[/yellow] Hopefully she would be able to perform those spells and they wouldn’t be as difficult as the patronus had turned out to be. It wasn’t just homework that had suffered as a result of her time away from magic – since returning she had had trouble performing certain spells. She paused as she listened to Niobe’s advice and nodded, never having tried aloe plant before. Most of the healing work she used was spellwork... it might be an idea to look into plants’ healing properties as well as that, especially with the trouble she was having lately. [yellow]”Do you think they’d have that in the potions classroom?”[/yellow] she asked.
She felt a little guilty when Niobe said about going, knowing she hadn’t been very friendly to the younger girl. [yellow]”It’s okay, you can stay. Why did you come in here anyway?”[/yellow]
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Niobe Blakes
Ravenclaw
[blue]Fourth Year Ravenclaw[/blue] Shadow Warrior of Earth
Posts: 88
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Post by Niobe Blakes on May 7, 2009 4:21:35 GMT -5
"I'm sure they would." Niobe responded "They have quite a few herbs, not all of them of the magical sense either. If they don't, I'm sure it can be found."
Niobe wasn't sure what to do when the girl asked her to stay. She wasn't going to pry yet there wasn't much conversation to be had. When she was asked why she had bothered to come in, Niobe frowned a bit in thought.
"Well, I...felt an urge to come in this direction." she said honestly "I can't quite explain it, only that I was going to keep going, but something told me not to." she shrugged, dismissing it as anything serious "It's quite strange really, I've been going through some odd scenarios lately." she smiled at the girl "I'm glad I'm not bothering you though. If you want, maybe we could go and see if there's any food or drink about. A cup of tea might do you a bit of good."
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Post by Caitlin Collins on May 8, 2009 7:39:04 GMT -5
Caity nodded, already planning to go find Professor Sparrow and ask if she could have some of those ingredients. She could always say that she fell if she was asked why, and offer to replace them next time she went into Hogsmeade. The scrape on her hand was really quite painful – she hadn’t been thinking when she’d hit the wall, or she certainly wouldn’t have done it so hard… or at all. It wasn’t anything like her normally. The frustration stayed in her until she cried it out… she didn’t punch it out on unsuspecting walls.
She frowned a little as Niobe spoke of this urge she’d had to follow… she hoped it was a one off thing, or connected to the room rather than herself. She really could do without someone following her and then constantly bumping into them. [yellow]”What kind of odd scenarios?”[/yellow] she questioned, wondering what that referred to. It might be completely innocuous and normal everyday school stuff – at least, normal in comparison to what ‘odd’ counted as in her life now. Seeing burning images everywhere and dead people talking to her. That was definitely odd.
She nodded, managing a fake smile that hopefully didn’t look too fake as she stood, stretching her shoulders back a little and glanced up at Niobe – who, although she thought was in a younger year, was taller than her… as usual. It was only the much younger years who were shorter than her, it seemed.
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Niobe Blakes
Ravenclaw
[blue]Fourth Year Ravenclaw[/blue] Shadow Warrior of Earth
Posts: 88
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Post by Niobe Blakes on May 8, 2009 15:05:24 GMT -5
The topic was being switched from Caitlin to her, which was fine. Whatever was wrong with the older girl she didn't want to talk about. Niobe could understand.
However, did she really want to tell her about what was going on with her? It was of a somewhat personal nature...D'rorah was still trying to help her figure it out.
"Nothing serious." Niobe began "Just odd dreams is all. Do you want me to accompany you to the classroom? We can walk and talk."
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Post by Caitlin Collins on May 11, 2009 16:55:55 GMT -5
Apparently Niobe wasn't too keen on sharing her problems either, and since Caitlin couldn't really ask more without being hypocritical herself, she let it be. Of course her constant curiosity didn't want her to, but she pushed it down as soon as it reared its head. [yellow]"Bad dreams?"[/yellow] she asked, offering advice in return rather than asking too many questions. [yellow]"You could always go to the nurse or Professor Sparrow and ask for a potion to give dreamless sleep,"[/yellow] she suggested. It was something she had reverted to on occasion when she was truly exhausted but whenever she closed her eyes the nightmares came back. Unfortunately she absolutely hated the taste, so she kept its use to a minimum whenever she could.
Caitlin was a little confused by Niobe's mention of a classroom, before realising that she meant they could go there before getting food. [yellow]"Okay. I'm not sure what it looks like anyway,"[/yellow] she admitted, never having used the raw ingredient before. That might change if it proved to be useful on this occasion. After the talk with Dylan last week, she had determined to try and find ways that she could be useful... healing was one thing she could focus on without feeling bad about it affecting her morals.
Glancing back at the wall she had hit, there was no visible mark – apparently Hogwarts was made of sterner stuff than the skin and bone of her scraped hand. Opening the door to the ballroom she exited, her wand safely in her pocket, and held the door open for Niobe so she could come out before heading to the dungeon steps. She made sure to walk next to the Ravenclaw so that she wasn't avoiding human contact – something she had slipped into the habit of recently.
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Niobe Blakes
Ravenclaw
[blue]Fourth Year Ravenclaw[/blue] Shadow Warrior of Earth
Posts: 88
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Post by Niobe Blakes on May 13, 2009 8:55:02 GMT -5
Niobe considered Caitlin's suggestion. Dreamless sleep? A part of her wanted to go for it, to bask in lack of nightmares. However, if she did that, wouldn't she be running away? Also, she would be unable to figure out what was going on if she had a dreamless sleep. Perhaps, with D'rorah's help, she'd be able to figure out something.
"I'll look into it, thank you very much." Niobe said politely. "It just might help me considerably. "There's no need for you to come along with me, I don't want to inconvenience you like that. Besides, your minor injury is much more important than my silly dreams."
Niobe was silent for a moment as they walked towards the Herbology classroom "Aloe is a very unique looking plant; once you've seen it, you'll definitely recgonize it again. It's a series of..." she paused as she tried to think of the proper verbage. "leaves. Basically, they're green leaves, somewhat triangular in shape, thick with spiny sides. When you cut them open, they have a rather thick, but clear substance inside. Aloe can be used internally or externally....ah, I'm sorry. I started rambling." she said, a bit embarrassed. "I tend to do that, a bit of a nasty habit really."
If Caitlin felt uncomfortable or disliked Niobe's company, the girl wouldn't have known it. Niobe was now in her own mental world, thinking about aloe plants and other things to help Caitlin. She also thought about food. She wondered what would be served today.
"What are you in a particular mood for?" she asked randomly, lost in her thoughts to a point where she wasn't even aware that Caitlin would probably have no idea of what she was talking about. Niobe's mind was always working, shooting off in different directions to a point that she could sometimes not be followed, even by others with intelligence. She simply tended to be random.
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Post by Caitlin Collins on May 13, 2009 15:22:05 GMT -5
Caitlin got the feeling that Niobe wasn't particularly over enthused with her suggestion of a potion for dreamless sleep, but didn't push it any further. Upon hearing of it at first, she had also been a little wary – she had never liked taking medicine when she was younger and the same objections had transferred to potions when she had discovered the magical world. There was no denying how useful they could be, though.
Having taken a few steps in the direction of the dungeons, Caitlin suddenly realised that Niobe was heading in the opposite direction, towards the main doors outside. Blinking, it suddenly occurred to her that since aloe was a plant, it would probably be in the greenhouses rather than the potions lab. She couldn't recall ever using it in any potions that she had made at the school, come to think of it. Turning, she quickly hurried after Niobe, a slight red tinge to her cheeks as she caught up. [yellow]"Sorry,"[/yellow] she muttered in embarrassment.
She listened with interest as Niobe described the plant, having never heard someone so enthused about a plant before. [yellow]"No, it's okay – carry on,"[/yellow] she prompted. It sounded as though she had just been getting onto the plant's uses, which was what Caity was really interested in. [yellow]"You like Herbology?"[/yellow] she asked.
Not entirely sure what Niobe was talking about at her last words, Caitlin blinked once in confusion. [yellow]"Pardon?"[/yellow]
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Niobe Blakes
Ravenclaw
[blue]Fourth Year Ravenclaw[/blue] Shadow Warrior of Earth
Posts: 88
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Post by Niobe Blakes on May 15, 2009 2:03:27 GMT -5
Niobe focused her thoughts on explaining more of the aloe plant "Ah, well...there's about three hundred species, although only a few of them are actually used for healing purposes. Internal issues are mostly digestive, while external issues can be for wounds and certain skin conditions. It even helps relieve pains of wounds and burns immedately. It puts a nice little film over whatever you rub it on."
Caitlin asked her during the conversation about enjoying Herbology. The question threw her off guard for a moment. "Well, I suppose I do, although I've never really thought about it. My mother comes from a long line of herbal charms and potion makers and she taught me a lot. Of course, you need to understand herbs to understand potions so I suppose when I think about it I do love herbology. As a little girl I was always fascinated by the things my mother did and she always took the time to indulge me in my curiousities."
She remembered as a young girl walking along the gardens that her mother had made, being told what each plant did and why. She had always loved being outside and picking herbs the most, just as much as she had loved learning martial arts.
Somehow in the conversation, wires had gotten crossed. Niobe's brain began to work frantically when Caitlin appeared confused at her for some reason. She tried to backtrack to what had been said to cause the confusion.
"Um...food..." she trailed off, looking a bit confused "I think I was talking about food." she laughed a bit nervously "Sorry about that. I tend to think ahead in conversations." ((OOC: Sorry so short, gotta catch the bus!))
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Post by Caitlin Collins on May 15, 2009 13:44:16 GMT -5
Caity blinked in surprise when she was told there were over a hundred species, and was suddenly reminded of why she had disliked Herbology to start with. All those names... so much to remember... and then even if you could remember the basics, there were all the different species that came among them. Still, she listened as Niobe described how certain types could be used for healing. The Ravenclaw's knowledge was certainly impressive, but then, she was a Ravenclaw.
[yellow]"Wow, yeah... I just can't remember stuff like that. Although I doubt I'll forget about aloe once I've used it, but I don't really want to have to use every single plant to remember it."[/yellow] Thinking of plants that could be used for healing – those she was actually interested in – Caity winced internally to imagine what she would have to have gone through to use the majority of common healings plants... it was painful to even think about.
[yellow]"My parents are both muggles, so I never learnt anything about Herbology till I went to India... I wasn't very good at it there, but the plants in India generally don't grow here and vice versa, so it pretty much all went out the window,"[/yellow] she explained briefly. It was just a shame that to be a an official healer at St Mungo's you needed a NEWT in Herbology... Although at the moment she very much doubted she would ever get close to that, maybe if she kept on with this trying to recover her grades and spellwork from before she might just manage it. It was a very slim hope, and one she didn't really think would go anywhere, but it was more than she had had before speaking to Dylan.
[yellow]"Oh, food... right... sorry,"[/yellow] Cait also apologised, a slight reddish tinge appearing on her face as she realised what Niobe had been talking about. [yellow]"Don't worry... I do that too sometimes. I start speaking about something and no one has any idea what I'm on about,"[/yellow] she related, smiling slightly at the memory. It was strange, smiling again... the motion had been missing for so long that now, as she was finding herself make it again, it felt like it was a little out of place, making any smiles she did make slightly uncertain. [yellow]"Um... I have no idea what I'd like... something sweet, preferably..."[/yellow] She had a sudden desire for shahi tukra, a type of bread pudding she'd eaten constantly while in India after discovering it. She somehow doubted that the elf kitchens would possess it though, let alone the main food being served in the Great Hall.
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Niobe Blakes
Ravenclaw
[blue]Fourth Year Ravenclaw[/blue] Shadow Warrior of Earth
Posts: 88
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Post by Niobe Blakes on May 20, 2009 18:07:40 GMT -5
Niobe laughed a bit at Caitlin's concern "No worries, only a small percentage of the aloe plants are actually used in medicine. Aloe Vera is a very popular one." a pause "As for me, once I'm really interested in learning something it takes me little time at all to remember it. I suppose that's why I ended up being in Ravenclaw." she laughed a bit "My mother always called me a 'sponge' growing up."
Caitlin's mention of traveling to India piqued Niobe's interest considerably "India?" she asked "My family has been to India..." she looked a bit sheepish "Well, my Grandmothers and what have you. Some of our herbal research involves some herbs from India. My family traveled a lot then trying to acquire worldly knowledge. My mother's always wanted to go. I would love to go just so say I have been. What a wonderful experience traveling is!"
There seemed to be a wistful tone to the other girl's voice, to the point where Niobe felt a bit curious "Are you interested in Herbology?" she asked "I'm not nearly as knowledgable as my mother but I could ask her to send me some books on the subject and I can help you with what I do know. It's mostly a hobby for me but I don't mind helping at all, especially if it'll benefit someone."
The two walked on towards the classroom when the subject of food came up once again. Niobe was not a sweets person, although she didn't hate it either. She was more of a spicy food person herself. "I haven't had something sweet in a while..." she said softly, sounding contemplative "I would do anything for some of mother's cooking, it's been a while."
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Post by Caitlin Collins on May 21, 2009 5:52:46 GMT -5
Caity nodded as Niobe spoke, trying to remember exactly what she was saying for future. Learning by rote had never really worked for her – she had to visualise it or do something herself, which was the method Vijay had used while teaching her in India due to a lack of many textbooks. Being taught at Hogwarts was certainly a different experience, but she was just about used to it now. Herbology, however, just didn’t seem to work with that method. [yellow]”Yep, I’m no Ravenclaw,”[/yellow] she replied. Certain subjects she might enjoy, and she was generally quite intelligent, but she didn’t seem to have that dedication to learning for the sake of it that most Ravenclaws did. If she was interested in the subject, then sure, she’d read more about it, but she wouldn’t find out details for the simple sake of knowing them.
[yellow]”Really? When? And where did they go?”[/yellow] she asked, her interest also piqued by this knowledge. She didn’t know many people who had been to the country, and although Niobe hadn’t been herself she had likely heard stories of the place from her relatives. [yellow]”I lived in Hyderabad for five years; we moved back last summer,”[/yellow] she explained briefly, keeping what she was saying short so she didn’t get carried away with talking about the place.
[yellow]”Not really interested in the subject… but I want to be a Healer, and apparently I need NEWT level Herbology for that.”[/yellow] It had been quite an annoyance when she’d realised that, after finding out that in 6th year, subjects at Hogwarts were not compulsory. As they neared the greenhouse, Caity slowed a little. Despite the description, she wasn't entirely sure what she was looking for and didn't want to pick out the wrong plant by accident.
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